We have all wished for that which we do not have. Even as infants, we scream and yell to communicate our desires, and as toddlers most if not all of us took the toy truck from little Jimmy, because 'it's mine'. In high school, I saw many people place their identity in material possessions-I too participated in this form of idolatry at times. Doing so ironically depletes our satisfaction and increases our yearning for what we want.
What is it we want, exactly?
Whenever you aren't satisfied, do you stop to consider what you are yearning for?
In every stage of life there are examples of humanity wanting. We want, we envy, we take-because whatever it is we want is ours to have. Perhaps this is problematic only in American culture, but I'd argue this prideful sin can be found among the nations (though our wealth is perhaps a bigger playground for Satan and our flesh to tempt our souls with).
Not every desire is sinful.
When we find ourselves wanting, we must ask the question, 'Is this a desire I want, or is it one I need?'
To differentiate between the two and arrive at a satisfactory answer, I propose this mindset: to fix our eyes on what lasts.
'So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal'.
-2 Corinthians 4:18
Sometimes I read the words of other authors or bloggers and wish I could write so poetically. Then I am reminded that it matters not how well one writes. What matters is that I give my gifts-the ones my Father gave me specifically-back to God by using them to their full potential. What matters is my heart behind my writing, because anyone can speak or write with the words of angels but be a resounding gong if he/she has not love. Oftentimes I wish I were as intelligent as [insert theologian here]. Then I am reminded that we often do not need to be the intelligent mind that speaks, rather we should be the kind heart that listens.
When I was in Haiti this summer (I'm missing it greatly this week), it was so easy to be satisfied with the goodness of God, because that was all we had to hold on to-and it was all we needed. One of my biggest struggles on returning to the states is being surrounded with so much crap. Pardon my crudeness. I would use a stronger word but I'm not sure that would be wise here. I'll refrain for the sake of this audience.
It just frustrates me. We convince ourselves in America that we need more than we really do-or worse, that we don't need what our souls truly can only be fulfilled with.
We need Jesus. We don't truly need [fill in the blank].
If you are a privileged American, you must know what I mean. Consumerism is thrown in our faces every day. Buy this, get that. You need it. Your life won't be complete without the newest edition of whatever the newest trend is.
I'm not standing in judgement, because I do it too.
I also don't want to harp on the secular, because that isn't the point of this post. It's just that there is such beauty in simplicity. I have to focus on the light, because it chases away the faltering dark and sheds light on what matters. I admire people who live simply, because it shows their worth is not in materialism. One of my sweet babycakes who I led in bible study last year has decided she will not wear makeup in her wedding, Lord-willing she is married. She doesn't think it's wrong to do so. She just sees no value in it. Why would she? The Holy Spirit inside of her brings a radiant beauty no makeup product could ever compare to. A genuine smile is the most stunning accessory she could wear.
[The joy of the Lord is her strength].
One of my closest friends back in College Station decided to cut her hair one year, because she knew she was placing value in her beautiful, long locks. She only wanted her identity in grace and grace alone.
Maybe these examples are drastic, but before you dismiss such mindsets as not for you, answer this question: where are their hearts?
We can't truly know the heart of another, but at the same time our faith proves to be true by the fruit our lives produce. Our actions reflect our hearts.
Over the past two years I've personally been convicted of my desires. I constantly must ask myself if my wishes are needs or wants. Am I fixing my eyes on the seen or the unseen?
Am I envying what other people have, or am I resting in His sufficient grace?
Am I striving to fulfill myself with that which will not last, or am I resting in His satisfactory love?
When we were children, we screamed for the toys we thought we needed-the ones we thought we deserved. Have we grown up at all? I'm twenty years old, and the temptation to act in such childish ways is as strong as ever. I pray that I have learned to depend on my Father for provision more than I did when I was younger.
It's beautiful to have a child-like spirit. It's embarrassing to have a child-like immaturity.
It's a daily struggle, but I find taking baby steps in simplifying yields way to slow but sure progress and victorious triumph.
My dear friend and recent neighbor, Ashlyn, publishes a lovely blog and has previously focused on the idea of simplicity. Read her thoughts about it here.
